Liveblog: Euro 2008 Final

I am attempting something I never have before and following after The Sports Guy… liveblogging while watching a sporting event. I have been pumped for the UEFA Euro 2008 Final between Germany and Spain all week and the day is here. Since Germany have plenty of Euro Championships under their belt, I am rooting for Spain. Plus, I have been to Germany and Spain is still on my list. Here it goes!

11:32 - I see why Americans struggle to like Europeans, this is a freaking weird pre-game show.

11:38 - Now my buddy Kerry can like soccer, his man-crush Enrique Iglesias just played a song to end the pre-game show.

11:39 - Andy Gray just belittled the halftime show by saying “Now the real business can begin.” Brilliant.

11:43 - Spain’s national anthem has no words apparently, so why do I hear voices singing in the crowd?

11:44 - Nevermind, the crowd just cut to a Spanish woman singing “LALALALALA-LALALA”.

11:45 - Germany wins the battle of the national anthems…

11:48 - Opening kick. Non-event.

11:52 - ABC really needs to fix their audio problem, I didn’t care during the NBA Finals because I didn’t watch, but this is ridiculous.

11:55 - Andy Gray finally starts in to his “talk about the refs with disgust like they are drunken kindergardners pooping on the midfield” routine… 7th minute, thats a record for him.

11:59 - I can’t stop saying the name Schwienstieger! (pronounced, SHH-VINE-SHH-STIGER)… that is more fun than saying Luol Deng.

12:02 - Whoooooo! Almost an own-goal by a German defender. Big no no.

12:05 - For the third time now a Spanish striker pulled up while attacking, this frustrating, JUST SHOOT ALREADY!

12:08 - Sergio crosses, brilliant header by Torres… POST! Germans saved by the woodwork… wow, that was so close.

12:14 - I like how American sports networks deal with the ad unfriendlyness of soccer: make the announcer plug sponsors products and programming during the match. Oh and those tiny little ad boxes that drop down periodically from the bottom of the score overlay.

12:19 - Nice pass from Xavi, Torres splits two defenders, keeper hesitates… GOOOOOAAAALL!!

12:20 - Andy Gray’s Scottish voice dropped two octaves in describing Torres goal, “He had no right making that goal! No right at all!’

12:20 - Spain 1, Germany 0

12:22 - Spain on the attack again, Torres wide open, the cross, pops the ball straight up… wasted.

12:23 - They showed German wonderboy, Michale Ballack’s eye, it is bleeding profusely… Adrian Healey reports that Ballack will “get it stapled shut”… man, Germans are tough.

12:25 - Ballack comes back on, fouls Iniesta, then gets sent back off because his eye is still bleeding… can anyone say Steve Nash?

12:27 - Andy Gray laments the blatant idiocy of the linesman who just called a foul, he sounds personally offended. German corner… wasted.

12:29 - Now Andy’s pissed, “Oh let it go, referee, please!” The ref books Casillas, the Spanish keeper, and Ballack for arguing. If Andy Gray doesn’t pipe down, he might get a yellow too.

12:32 - HALFTIME. Spain 1, Germany 0

12:33 - Now the time also known as, ‘lets see how many commercials we can cram into 15 minutes’ begins.

12:37 - I think ABC’s audio problem is a stereo problem. I just saw a commercial where one voice was 90% inaudible, its like somewhere there is a left channel cable just barely plugged in. And no, its not my TV.

12:46 - For no good reason, i just yelled out, “Schwienstieger!”

12:46 - One thing I won’t miss from Euro 2008 is that lame “official rejoiner music”… its like bubble gum techno with way too much reverb… game on.

12:48 - Halfway in, the star of the show so far is Andy Gray’s commentary.

12:52 - After a uncalled foul on Torres, Adrian Healey asks Andy Gray his opinion of the no call to which Andy replies, “Ahh, he’s the ref, he has his qualifications” followed by a chuckle. I think he just got warned by the show’s producer to shut it and besides, the ref is Italian, what do you expect?

12:56 - Spain attacking, Torres back passes to Xavi, shoots… just wide!

12:59 - Torres almost just scored the EXACT same way he did the first time.

1:01 - Germany just subbed in a guy who looks like Ardeth Bay from The Mummy.

1:04 - Germany is turning it on now, Ballack just missed followed by a near-miss by SCHWIENSTIEGER!

1:07 - Spain takes off Fabregas and brings on Xabi Alonso… about time.

1:08 - Wow, Ramos got away with a half-Zidane head-butt on Podolski. Ballack is arguing with the linesman and Andy Gray is calling Ramos a “lucky, lucky boy.” The game is about to erupt I think.

1:12 - Brilliant set piece and Spain almost scores a header. Gray asks the same thing Winston Churchill and FDR asked each other 60 years ago, “What are the German’s thinking!?

1:16 - This just in: the Spanish keeper insured his hands for $15 million last month, now THAT’S investigative reporting! The Germans look desperate, even though they have plenty of time.

1:17 - Torres gets a yellow for bumping heads with a German defender. Andy Gray is bewildered and confused and lets us know about it.

1:22 - Torres off, Guiza on for Spain; the German keeper comes awfully close to handling the ball outside the box… awaiting replay… yep, he was outside.

1:25 - Senna passes out of the box to Guiza, crosses to Xabi, Xabi to Senna… misses the open goal! Germany dodged the nail in the coffin.

1:31 - Germany is down to their last 4 minutes… you never know what will happen with the way this years Euro has gone though.

1:33 - If they ever make a Michael Ballack Story movie, Matt Damon is dead ringer to star in it.

1:36 - In a pathetic, last-ditch effort, a German defender flops and grabs his back… no sympathy.

1:37 - SPAIN WINS. Good match.

Thats why I love soccer, the emotion, the drama, the skill, the fluidity of the beautiful game.